Cape Town with Aunt Helen

After 3 days in the wine country with Uncle David, we spent three incredible days near the beach in the Cape Town suburb of Camps Bay. We stayed a few blocks from Helen's adorable cottage on the beach in Bakhoven. Much to everyone who wasn't with there's chagrin, we lounged, drank wine, shopped and strolled around. We had great weather for the first 2 days; on the 3rd day a major gale kicked in, though we managed to brave the elements to pick shells and drink a toast on the beach to Jennifer, Michael, Nick and Chelsea -- all of whom were there in spirit. In fact, the full rainbow that appeared just after our sundowners above Helen's cottage was their way of letting us know they were around. We wrapped up our stay in Cape Town with the most amazing Turkish dinner at Helen and Nick's favorite spot -- Anatolis. It was a perfect wrap to the most incredible trip.

Drumming on the Farm

For our last night in Livingstone on the farm, Liam set up a drumming session with a local musician. It was great fun -- Granny announced to everyone how much better she was with her left hand while totally off beat and key! We sounded horrendous, but had a blast.

Water!

Bore holes (wells) are as common in Africa as Blackberries in the States. I set out with Simon to fetch water on the farm and to see what one looked like (city boy). Here I am pumping water looking quite farmer, I'd say.

Last Night In Kitwe

In true Nina fashion, she hosted a stunning meal for us on our last night at she and Simon's home in Kitwe. There were 13 of us for dinner, including two adorable children, Fynn and Sinead. Aside from a chance for me to meet Nina's social circle, it was a great chance to christen she and Simon's stunning new veranda -- river-side safari chic, I'd say!

Beachside in Betty's Bay

We had a leisurely breakfast in the Wilderkrans dining room this morning (formerly the farm’s stables) and then drove west to the Atlantic, and then down the coast a bit to meet Helen and Nigel at Nigel’s fantastic mid-century beach house in Betty’s Bay. After a stroll through the “jack ass” penguin colony (no, that’s not mom’s terminology, it’s actually their name) we had a casual Sunday lunch on the harbor in Kleinmond. This is easily the most beautiful place I've ever seen -- just incredible!

Cape Town with Aunt Helen

We arrived in Cape Town on Friday after a stormy, chaotic transfer in Jozi. Uncle David met us at the airport, and then escorted us out in our PIECE OF MAIRD renault (sorry, Colette, the French build the worst cars on the planet) to his home near Howe Hoek, the inn that Jennifer and Michael managed back in the mid 70s. We met up with Aunt Helen and her friend, Nigel, on Saturday. David, Helen, Nigel, Colette and I then headed out to Franschhoek for the South African Cheese Festival. Colette and I were in heaven -- the wine, cheese, scenery and people-watching were full-on first world. As we've felt for most of the trip, we wondered if we'd been dropped from a UFO onto another planet. It's funny how the first world can feel so foreign after so much time in the bush! We wrapped up the day with a braai at Uncle David's -- William and his wife, Marina, and William's mom, Chris, joined us for a great evening. All in all it was a fantastic day.

Gorge Swing with Liam

For those of you who know me, you'll find this most unbelievable... i actually jumped off a cliff in tandem with my brother, Liam, in Livingstone. It was a 200-foot drop. And for those of you who know me, you won't be surprised that I screamed like a girl all the way down! While I will never do something like it again, it was incredible to break through this life-long fear with my brother.

Nina, Me & Colette at Bumi Hills

Liam & Me

just a catch-up post to attach another pic that didn't upload on the last post

Meeting Liam

Meeting Liam



We arrived in Victoria Falls from Harare safe and sound. Liam and Ashleigh met us just outside arrivals. It was just so surreal meeting Liam as we definitely have lots of similarities looks-wise. It’s odd going your whole life not seeing anyone who looks like you and then you’re face to face with your brother. Liam’s 6’3” just like me. And despite what granny says, we both share tall, blonde handsome features. LOL. I wondered… should I shake his hand, hug him, or what? I just winged it and ended up shaking his hand, and then turned and gave Ashleigh a big hug. We all piled into the truck and headed to the Zim side of Victoria Falls. Liam and I had a good chat and walk around the falls – Liam used to fly tourist flights over the Falls, so was quite knowledgeable and explained quite a lot about the view. I instantly felt comfortable with him and was just so chuffed (as Liam would say) to meet him and start getting to know him. That evening I ran some farm chores with Liam – it was so funny to watch all of the staff stop in their tracks and study both of us. I swear the guard to the tobacco barns thought he’d seen a ghost as he gazed into the cab of the truck and saw me sitting their next to Liam. Or, perhaps they’re all freaked out that there may be a Liam “twin” running around to boss them around more. LOL






Day 2 – Livingstone


Woke up at 5:30 at first light, grabbed coffee with Liam (he, too, NEEDS coffee every a.m.) and then ran more farm chores with him. I could tell the entire farm was still abuzz about the story, and my arrival. As we walked the tobacco sorting facility, out of the corner of my eye I noticed all the ladies looking at me, then at Liam, and then back at me. We then came back to the house for a proper farm breakfast of eggs, bacon and toast before heading out on a farm tour – banana fields, ripening rooms, tobacco barns, sorting barn and the irrigation pump house. I can see what drew Jennifer and Chris to the land here – the houses sit atop a hill overlooking the valley and the Zambezi River. And there’s plenty of irrigation water available from the River. We then visited Waterberry Lodge and had a few shandys on the veranda overlooking the river. We then ran over to Doug’s, Liam’s friend who boards the horses, and watched Liam train polocross while trotting around the field on Ashleigh’s horse, BushBuck. We ended the day with a quick swim and then ran into town for a visit to the internet café and then to dinner at Ocean Basket in Livingstone.






Day 3 – Livingstone


Woke to the dogs this morning and a quick cup of coffee with Liam before heading to Doug’s next door for Liam’s polocross practice, followed by a braai of chicken, beef and salad washed down with still more shandys. It was really cool to meet Liam’s friends and see how he spends his Sundays. We then returned to the house for a romp in the pool, a few gin and tonics and then a leisurely meal of thin crust pizzas. Liam and I have so much in common:






• We must have a fan blowing – preferably on us -- in order to sleep


• We both eat incredible amounts of food


• We both HATE harry potter, lord of the rings and twilight (sorry Molly)


• We don’t care for pasta


• We sleep hot – no duvets or heavy blankets -- EVER


• We both have similar bony lumps on the back of our heads


• He hates apples


• He has an absolute fit if he gets a bad haircut


• He complains about his double chin in pictures

CatchUp Post

Day 8 – Bumi Hills







Woke up early today, piled into 2 cars and headed north to Charles Prince Airport where we met Solly and Lindsay, our charter pilots for the 2 planes we took to Bumi Hills on the shores of Lake Kariba about an hour and half flight from Harare. Mom, Dad, Nina, Simon and Colette left first with Solly, while Paul, Jan and I flew behind them in a smaller, slower plane. We flew over Darwindale dam, not far from Jennifer’s old farm, Woodrow. We landed on a gravel airstrip just behind the hotel and were greeted by a herd of elephants and impala. Bumi was stunning – very modern and comfortable. We had a relaxing afternoon poolside before catching a late afternoon boat ride to watch the sunset behind a dramatic storm cloud with shandies and g&t.






Day 9 – Bumi Hills






After sleeping in a bit, we all gathered for an amazing full English breakfast on the veranda overlooking Lake Kariba. We essentially had the resort to ourselves with the exception of a rather shy, and probably often startled, French couple. After some louning around the pool, and still more shandies, we all (yes, even Dad) piled into the boat and headed west to visit Jan’s cousin, Vickus, who runs a mapana fishery on the shores of the Lake. We had a great visit with him – he was thrilled to have company as he lives on the fishery alone while his wife and kids stay in Harare. He told us all about the overfishing, and unusually high water levels from the heavy rains of late. We then piled back into the boat and headed back to the resort. While cruising alone in some choppier waters than mom would’ve liked, we spotted a camp fire on the beach – turns out that was a surprise “bush dinner” Nina arranged. So, we beached the boat on the shore there and enjoyed still more sundowners along with some incredible Zim beef. An incredible meal to wrap up an incredible day.






Day 10 – Mana Pools






This morning we met caroline, Liam’s old boss and charter airline owner, at the airstrip and all piled into a little corporate-style plane for our quick trip over to Mana Pools. The Vardens, our safari guides, greeted us at the strip in Mana. We bid Paul and Jan farewell as they headed back to Harare, and then piled into the Land Cruiser to head to camp. We were joined by a great couple from Harare, and originally from the UK, Lachy and Mel. Lachy is a diplomat with the UK foreign service based in Harare. They were such a cool couple and were really cool with what many might’ve considered a disruption to a quiet weekend in the bush. They joined right into the group and were great fun. We arrived at the camp along the Zambezi River, had a tasty lunch under the Zambezi Fig tree, and then went for a bush walk hosted by James Varden, easily one of the most knowledgeable people I’ve ever met. While we didn’t’ find our elusive lion, we saw wart hogs, zebra, loads of elephants and plenty of hippos. Wrapped the day with a great dinner and sundowners around the camp fire. And mom even braved the outdoor shower. Meanwhile, Colette and I plowed head on into our first real camping experience with our usual sense of humor and lots of giggling that kept even Lachy and Mel amused.






Day 11 – Mana Pools






Woke up with a baboon wakeup call and the sound of splashing hot water in our tent-side washbowl at 5:30. After some fire-brewed Zim coffee, Colette, Nina, Simon, Mel, Lachy and I headed down to the shores of the River and piled into canoes for a 4-hour river tour – complete with LOADS of hippos, egrets, eagles, buffalo, elephants and a Lochness-monster-sized monitor lizard that decided to pop its ugly head out of the water right next to me; for those of you who are familiar with my fear response, let’s just say it was consistent even in the bush… the ENTIRE group had a great laugh and the guide later on told me he thought I was going to jump out of the boat! Needless to say, that was NEVER an option. We arrived back in camp for brunch and I then spent the rest of the day lounging in my tent catching up on my magazine reading.






Day 12 – Mana Pools






After an invigorating early-morning bush walk with James, we all piled into the Land Cruiser and headed further west to the Konge camp, a truly hip 5-star tented camp alongside a gorgeous lagoon. The road to the camp traversed a very sandy wash where the road had been washed out by the recent heavy winter rains. After some strategic grading and shoveling, we managed to get both Janine’s Prado and the Land Cruiser across and then blasted through the Mopane forest and tse tse fly hell beore arriving at the Camp. After another bush walk, and several g&ts in the bush, we headed back to camp for hot showers, sundowers on the deck overlooking the lagoon, and then a drive out to an open vledt with palm trees and white sand for an hour of star-gazing and a champagne toast for my birthday.






Day 13 – Mana Pools






We arrived a bit late at Mana Pools airstrip this morning to catch what we thought would be both a charter flight, as well as Simon’s plane, for our trip back into Harare. Unfortunately, we arrived to find only one plane, the charter one, as Simon’s plane hadn’t yet been cleared for flight following its annual inspection and service. So, we sent mom, dad and Colette back to Harare while Nina, Simon and I stayed behind on the airstrip to await the plane’s return. As luck would have it, the camp hadn’t packed a “cooler box” on the Land Cruiser, so we were without water and food. So, we had the driver take us to main camp where we filled the two small water bottles we had with us, along with a larger one the driver found somewhere in the truck. He then dropped Simon and Nina and me off at the airstrip hanger where we raided Colette’s bag (thank God we kept her bag behind) for energy bars and zip fiz for sustinence, along with her yoga mats for nap pads and eyebrow tweezers and eyelash curler for entertainment. We were truly rolling Zim style! I hear there are plans this evening for my birthday, though have no clue what they might be.

Colette's Birthday

Celebrated Colette's birthday in Harare today. Colette and Nina were up at the crack of dawn and Colette joined Nina for a yoga class Nina instructed. We left Simon at the house to finish sorting out our private planes for the flight to Bumi on Saturday, and Mana on Monday. We all chipped in and bought Colette a gorgeous locally-made leather shoulder bag and popped in to see Loveness and introduce her to Colette. As luck would have it, Granny just happened to drive by as she was in town for her "ladies who lunch" gathering in Harare. So, she was able to meet Sonia, Claudia (AKA Colette) -- Granny has a hard time believing people aren't named how she would name them! We ended the day with a great meal on the veranda at Amanzi, an African fusion place to far from Paul's. Then off to bed for our 7 a.m. departure to Bumi Hills on Saturday, followed by a 3-day safari with the Vardens. Will be out of contact, now, with the first world for a week. Back in Harare on the 15th for my birthday, before flying Scare Zimbabwe to Livingstone on Friday the 16th to meet Liam and Ashleigh and spend some time on the farm. Stay tuned for safari posts in a week. The woman in the pic with Colette and me is Carey Brown, Nina's best friend who lives in Joburg and my future wife ;)

Colette Arrived Safely

After 28 hours, Colette arrived safely in Harare this evening. It was so great to see her. She and Nina are the same height!  Earlier in the day, before Colette arrived, we went to an old colonial aloe garden on the outskirts of Harare. The neglect of the past 10 years was painfully evident, though the countryside was stunning. Nina and Simon were a bit knackered (my Zim accent and vocabulary is coming along nicely) after our night out at Lime, so the walk was short and sweet.

Harare -- Day 6

Battled the snail-paced Internet connection for most of the morning and found out I burned all of Paul's 500MB daily limit in doing so! After getting through work emails, left the house around 1 and headed to the Dune Estate for lunch with Simon's best friend, Richard, and some shopping (much to Simon's chagrin). Along the way, we stopped at the local Apple reseller to charge Nina's Macbook Air -- she left her charger at Impinge and the folks at the store were kind enough to charge the computer for her while we were at lunch. Ended up missing the turn into the store's parking lot and instead turned into the neighboring complex that looked like a delapidated old office block. As we were turning around, a plain-clothed guard approached the car aggressively and asked Simon "where do you come from" through his open window. Being a tough Zimbabwean, Simon quickly explained he'd made a mistake and was turning around. And despite the guard's apparent interest in continuing the discussion about Simon's lineage, we proceeded to quickly exit the lot. We all found the guy's aggression odd for such a rough looking facility. When we went back in to fetch the charged computer, I asked the receptionist what went on next door. She smiled prettily and said "oh, that's the CIO -- did you drive in there and have a hassle? it happens quite a lot" CIO is the equivalent of the CIA in the States. Close call, I'd say. Sure am glad I wasn't driving!!! The American accent would've likely caused a bit more tension (though I am practicing my Zimbabwean twang).

Joined Paul later in the afternoon for a visit to the local gym, Triton, and an hour-long training session with his personal trainer. Dashed back to the house for an incredible dinner and visit from Simon's grandfather, Des.

Tengenenge Sculpture Garden

Started the day off again with a hearty breakfast -- poached eggs, damned good bacon, and some more of those darned hot-crossed buns. Then headed out on a drive past a handful of reclaimed farms and up into the hills, past a chinese-run chrome mine that used to be a neigboring farm to Simon's, to Tengenenge Sculpture Garden. Essentially a massive outdoor gallery showcasing the work of 50+ Zimbabwean stone sculptors, the place had an eery, yet promising aura about it. The sheer volume of the pieces, and the creativity of the artists, was overwhelming. Found a great piece that to me signifies so much about my trip already (see the attached picture and the piece directly above the "Rebanico Bangura" sign). While I passed it over at first in favor of a few smaller (and lighter) pieces, Nina convinced me to head back and get it. I'm thrilled with it.

We then headed back to the farm for another incredible lunch -- moroccan chicken and sweet potatoes. Our al fresco dining was cut short due to a late season, heavy thundershower that sent us all inside with our ice cream and cake. We then bid a reluctant farewell to our hosts and headed back to Paul's in Harare driving through the beautiful early-Autumn gold light and someof the most beautiful countryside I've ever seen.

A Few More Photos of Day 4

A great one of Nina and Simon -- stylistas from Kitwe -- in the pea patch.

Fabulous Carey from Joburg, me and Granny Grace, "GG"

Day 4: Impinge Farm

Slept well last night in the original farm house, now Nicola's room, and woke with the sun at around 6:30. Had a great, proper, English Easter-brunch breakfast with bacon, fried tomato, poached egg and hot-crossed buns. Then went on a tour of the farm operations -- tobacco curing barns, where we saw some green tobacco fresh in from the farm being loaded into the dryers. We then drove out to the snow pea patch where we ate our full from the fields. We came back for a swim, and then the most incredible easter lunch -- roast beef, spicy salsa, focaccia (thanks to Nina's handywork in the kitchen), roasted potatoes and loads of incredible South African wines. Played fetch with an avacodo with Zara (the Bentley's gorgeous black mixed lab) splashed around in the pool afteward before piling back into the bakkie again (that's a diesel, 4-door extended cab pick-up for all you yanks LOL) and went up onto the top of the granite copy where we drank wine, watched the sunset and told stories of a time that's all too distant in our memories. But, they're good memories nonetheless.

Impinge Farm

Woke up early today (well, not according to Nina's standards) and packed up for a 2-day excursion to Simon's parents' farm, Impinge, which is about an hour and a half north of Harare. Granny Grace arrived and joined us for the journey -- full of sass and stories. Through some deft negotiations with the local chief, the family was able to maintain a portion of what once was a huge game, tobacco and chili pepper ranch. They have held on to just a portion, but fortunately still have their home and seem to be slowly getting back into production.  They were in the process of grinding the early harvest of chilis (using the Tabasco proprietary chili) and processing quite a bit of tobacco. The farm house is great, big and lived-in. We had an amazing lunch in garden -- popadams, curry, salad. Then drove up to the granite copy to watch the sunset serrenaded by baboons on the granite mountain to the north. Simon's uncles both lost their portion of the farm and his dad clings to just a portion. Simon's grandfather, Des, shared stories of the reclamation of Impinge farm, and another ranch Simon's grandfather owned in the southern vledt. Tomorrow we will celebrate Easter and enjoy what promises to be a great, warm late-summer day.

Day 1 & 2: Harare

The internet connection here is like dial up... A few of the photos intended for the last post, didn't upload. Here they are.

Days 1 & 2: Harare

I arrived in Harare around 6 p.m. on the 31st of March. Nina's plane landed just before mine, so we met right away at the baggage claim. Dad snapped some photos of us coming through arrivals, but he forgot the USB cable for his camera, so I'm afraid they're trapped on his camera until we're back in the States. I don't know what it is about dad and taking pictures off his camera -- must be something to do with a memory of cameras as analog devices!

It was surreal meeting Nina. We came back to Paul's gorgeous home and had a nice late dinner.

The first day, April 1, we toured around Harare to mom and dad's old stomping grounds -- their first apartment, and two of their old businesses: Strachans Photo Pharmacy, and Bell's Pharmacy Belvidere.

We also visited Nina's home here in Harare, that she now rents, as well as her housekeeper, Loveness. Loveness kept saying, "oh he looks just like boss..." when she saw me, obviously referring to Michael, my biological father. Nina's home here is so cute -- an original colonial home in the center of Harare not far from Mugabe's palace.

Today, the 2nd, we drove out to pick up Simon at Charles Prince Airport -- the place as if someone pressed pause in 1962 - it's virtually unchanged. It was haunting, actually.

We then drove out to Darwindale, and Jennifer's old farm, Woodrow, which is now broken up amongst 47 pals of the current owner. The land, 1200 acres that used to yield massive crops of tobacco, are now mostly dormant and the jacoranda-lined lane leading into the main farm house strewn with goats, 3-year-olds and chest-high weeds. The most heartbreaking part was the sight of Jennifer's old farm house, 15 years ago a glorious oasis, now chain-link-fenced off and guarded by a scrawny early 30s guy and a 1-year-old toddler. Simon spoke to him in Shonna, and asked if we could have a look around as it once was his relatives' farm, Jennifer. The guy said he understood our circumstances, but couldn't allow us to trespass. He said he had heard Jennifer had passed away, and was sorry to hear that. He said if he got in trouble with the boss, though, he would have nowhere to live. Simon said that he and Nina had nowhere to go, either.

And with that, we turned around, piled back in the car, and drove off down the broken-down, Jacoranda-lined lane. We couldn't see the farm house up close, or see where Michael was buried. It was heartbreaking to see Nina and Simon turn around and walk away from something that was once so beautiful, and the center of their lives. Fortunately, I managed to snap a pic of the chain and fence in front of the house before the "caretaker" intercepted us.

It was a sullen day, indeed. I'm glad Nina had Simon there with her as she needed the support. She hadn't visited the farm in 10-11 years. Jennifer lost it in 1995.

We also saw Mugabe's motorcade this morning on the way to the airport. At least 20 police on motorcycles, 15 new E class cop cars, and then his mercedes motorcade.

JNB

I arrived from Frankfurt a half hour earlier than I thought. And I while I had told Helen I would grab a shower at the South African Airways lounge and be cleared through customs by 9:30, in my rush I ran right by the lounge and out into the arrivals hall at 7:30. Rang Helen and she was still getting ready. So, I found a nice spot at a very nice Intercontinental Hotel just across from the arrivals hall and am now having a deliciously strong coffee and water with NO GAS. I cannot for the life of me figure out why anyone would find the bubble water refreshing. Joburg strikes me a bit like LA -- saw some stunning women in the airport. The weather is damp, but clear. I think rains went through last night -- very pretty countryside. Will chill here at the Intercontinental until Helen arrives to whisk me back to her new little cottage on the outskirts of Joburg for a shower, lunch and what I'm sure will be an incredible chat.

My First Reunion -- Aunt Helen

I land in Johannesburg at 8:35 a.m. on Wednesday morning, the 31st of March. Since I have an 8-hour layover, my aunt Helen, Michael's sister, will meet me at the airport to take me out to lunch and to show me around the city. I can't wait to meet her -- she will be the first of many "reunions," and has been such an amazing support to me over the past few months. (In the photo, she is with my second cousin, Leah, who lives in Austin Texas). She and Jennifer were best friends growing up, and she was the first in whom Jennifer confided about me. Here's Helen's description of when she and Jennifer spoke of me before her death:

I will share with you, when I see you, the conversations I had with Jen in

the November 2008 before she died. It was when I went to visit her on the

farm in Livingstone. They were brief conversations, she in her wheel chair

with the dogs and me walking alongside her. It was on one of those walks

that she told me your birth date and where you were born. When I asked if we

could look for you she said that she would like us to. By this stage she

hadn't told Nina and Liam. She felt it was time to tell them so that they

could ask any questions. She was the only person who could answer their

questions. They would have known about you one day and then she wouldn't be

there to talk to them. She expressed how much she had wished Michael was

beside her when she broke the news because she was very nervous, but Chris

helped her through it I know. He was wonderful for her and to her.

 So you are totally right, none of this might have happened if she hadn't
been dying. It feels strange. Fantastic though that something so sad can
bring about some happiness for you and Colette. Your worlds are opening up.

Can't wait to see you, Helen!

Nina's Contact with Mom on August 8, 2009

Here's the email from Nina to mom and dad after they spoke for the first time via phone....

Dear Robert and Jeanette



How lovely to chat to you! You sound so nice!


My name is Nina. I was born on 21 October 1972, to Jennifer Denise Read and Michael David Gibson. My father was at University in Grahamstown at that time, and their parents would not give their consent for them to marry. They thought that they were too young. My mother was born in 1951. My brother (your son) was born at the Lady Chancellor on 15 April 1970.


According to the register in Harare, he was adopted by” Robert Matthew Sydney Bell, a medical doctor and his wife Jeanette Bell. They were living in North Avenue, Salisbury.”


My mother only told me about her son, in January this year. She died in May. I was very happy to hear about him, and have been looking for him ever since.
Sadly, both my parents have died. My father died of pancreatitis (viral) in 1995, and my mother died 2 months ago from Motor Neurone Disease. They were both wonderful people, and I will send pictures of them for you.

 I have a younger brother, by 11 years. His name is Liam. He is also living in Zambia.

We were all living in Zim up until 7 years ago, when things got too tough. We lost our family farm in Darwendale during the land redistribution efforts. I now live in Kitwe, Zambia.



I got in touch with you via Paul Davies who remembered Robert. He actually looked on the Godfrey Huggins School website. Did you go there Robert? Paul is an anesthetist from Harare, but now lives in New Zealand.






I will attach some pictures for you.






I so look forward to hearing from you.






Kind regards, Nina.

Jennifer & Michael

I don’t know much about my biological mother and father, Jennifer & Michael. From what I can tell from my brief interactions with Nina and Liam, they must’ve been pretty incredible people. It honestly feels odd referring to them as “mom and dad,” so I will refer to them by name throughout this blog.



Jennifer met Michael through her best friend, and my aunt, Helen. Jennifer spent a great deal of time at the Gibson’s home growing up – the Gibsons’ home was always full of activity and food and was a nice diversion for Jennifer, who was an only child. Her father died while her mother, Grace, was giving birth. And Grace went on to raise Jennifer largely on her own.


When they fell pregnant, both sets of parents forbade Michael and Jennifer from marrying as Jennifer was still in high school, and Michael away at University in Cape Town. As a result, they had no choice to give me up for adoption as marriage was the only acceptable social structure within which to bring a child into the world of late 60s Rhodesia. While pregnant with me, Jennifer stayed with family friends at a farm in Rhodesia, Darwindale, that she and Michael would go on to manage as on-site managers, and then bought in the mid 90s just prior to Michael’s all-too-early death. He was 45.


Jennifer and Michael married in 1972, and had Nina. Liam came along 10 years later in 1982.


As Granny Grace tells it, (though I have a feeling she might have a penchant for well-intended dramatization), after Michael’s death, Jennifer went on to build Darwindale into one of the largest tobacco farms in Zimbabwe. Sadly, she lost the farm to Mugabe in 2001, and fled with all the animals she could fit into her trucks. She and her partner, Chris, landed in Livingstone, Zambia where they bought a farm on the banks of the Zambizi River, where Chris and Liam now live.


Jennifer died in May, 2009 after a difficult bout with Lou Gehrig’ disease. She was only 59. Shortly before her death in November, 2008, she and Helen went for a walk – Jennifer in her wheelchair surrounded by her dogs (they called her the “hairy dog mother” as she was always in the company of her four-legged friends) -- on the farm in Zambia. That’s when Jennifer told Helen about me (I don’t believe she’d shared the story with anyone up until that point). Helen asked if it would be OK with Jennifer if they looked for me. Jennifer said she hoped they would, and shared with Helen how scared she was to tell Nina and Liam about me after keeping my adoption a secret for so many years.


As Nina told me the first time we spoke on the phone, she was blown away that her mom had kept my secret from she and Liam for all those years. Helen told me that Michael struggled for many years with my adoption and many times wanted to reach out and find me, though Jennifer convinced him otherwise. I think this was out of an immense, unwavering respect for my parents, Robert and Jeanette, and an unwavering commitment to the decision she made on April 25, 1970 to give me up for adoption.


In much the same way, I was at peace with being adopted, and out of a great appreciation and respect for the pain that Jennifer and Michael must’ve gone through in making the decision to give up their first-born child, I chose to not pursue Jennifer or Michael out of respect for their decision. It’s uncanny how we both had the same mindset, yet so very sad that it kept us from ever meeting again. In the end, though, that was Jennifer’s wish. As Nina says, “all Mum’s need their secrets.”


Paul, Nina’s best friend, and our host in Harare, says he envisions the three of us – Liam, Nina and myself – together at Jennifer’s grave on the farm in Livingstone. It’s hard for me to imagine how that’s going to feel – surrounded by my siblings in the presence of a woman whose determination, strength and love for her children brought us together after 40 years.

Extended Family -- Liam

Liam lives on the farm in Livingstone with his girlfriend, Ashleigh. Here's a recent photo of the two of them looking just about as content with one another than anyone I've ever seen. And another of Liam on his new horse, a birthday present from Ashleigh.

Extended Family -- Nina & Simon

Here are some pics of the extended family. I'm so lucky to have another gorgeous sister, Nina. Here she is (tall one in khaki green) with her boyfriend, Simon (far right in tan shorts with red flag in hand), while on a airplane relay race in Zim in 2009. And here's the gorgeous couple again, this time on holiday in Zanzibar for New Years, 2010.

T Minus 17 Days

Wow. It's hard to believe that in a few weeks I will step off a plane in Harare, Zimbabwe and begin a trip, and a life experience, I never imagined. For those who don't know the story, I was born in what was Salisbury, Rhodesia on April 15, 1970 and adopted 10 days later by Robert and Jeanette Bell. Mom and Dad had moved to Rhodesia 17 years prior to escape the smog and gloom of post-War London to pursue sunnier, happier days. They had an amazing life in Salisbury -- a successful business, beautiful home and many of the trappings of colonial life. But, in 1972 they had the foresight to envision an even better life for me, and my newly adopted sister, Colette, in America. They made a very difficult decision to leave their home, belongings, and life they built in the country they loved, and left Salisbury in December, 1972 to build a new life in up-state New York.

Fast forward to August, 2009. In the lull following a busy reunion at my parents' home in the Red Rocks of Sedona, Arizona with me, my sister Colette and her family from Chicago, mom received a call very early in the morning of the 8th. The caller was Nina Gibson from Kitwe, Zambia. Mom still describes Nina's "gorgeous, calm Rhodesian accent and her poise" during the call. In short, Nina told mom that she believed she was my sister. After 30 minutes of fact sharing, dates lining up and continued conversations, mom and dad were convinced Nina was indeed my sister.

I woke up that morning to a series of voicemails and emails from mom and dad urging me to call them. They seemed happy and excited, so I was convinced the news was good. I suspected a multi-million dollar lottery payout was imminent. Turns out, it was far more than that.

I am indeed blessed to have another sister, Nina Gibson, and a brother, Liam Gibson. They each live in Zambia now after having fled unimaginable loss in Zimbabwe. Nina, a few years younger than me, lives with her partner Simon in Kitwe, northern Zambia. Liam, in his late 20s, manages my birth mother's farm in Livingstone, Zambia along the banks of the Great Zambizi River with his girlfriend, Ashleigh.

There is, though, a sad part to the story. My birth father, Michael, died in 1995. And my birth mother, Jennifer, died in May, 2009. Shortly before her death, she sat Nina and Liam down and told them about the baby she and Michael gave up for adoption a few years before they were eventually married. Nina told Jennifer she would find me and tell me what an amazing mother she was.

And, so here I sit. On the verge of a trip back to the country of my birth -- a place both my sets of parents loved so dearly -- to meet an extension to my family that I NEVER imagined existed. I arrive in Harare on March 30. Nina and my parents (who arrive a few hours before me) will meet me at the airport. Colette will join us a week later. We will stay in the lap of luxury in Harare at Nina's amazing friends', Paul's and Jan's, home. We will see it all -- from our childhood home, to my parents' old business, to the hospitals where we were born. We will see Jennifer and Michael's old farm in Zimbabwe (now owned by Mugabe) and their homes in Harare. We will spend a week on safari, hang out at my brother's' farm, visit Nina's home in Kitwe, meet my grandmother in Harare and my Aunt in Cape Town. I will spend my 40th birthday in Zambia surrounded by my new extended family. How cool is that? I'm so fortunate that my parents, and Colette, will join me and share in the experience with me. I will do my best to post regularly to the blog whenever an Internet connection is available.

Thanks to all of you for your support and encouragement. Each of you has played a part in making this trip possible. But most importantly, thanks to Mom and Dad for your remarkable openness and acceptance of what for many might have been disturbing events, and for giving Colette and me such amazing opportunities and your unconditional love. Without you guys, none of this would've been possible. I love you so much.